and the rain broke apart the clear blue sky
by Motokoro
Summary: Haise didn't even realize that he was on his knees before he could stop it, clutching his sides, vision dotted with black spots as his head throbbed and his chest ached. Desperately trying to get the image of that golden glinted hair out of his head. (One-Shot) Mash-up of the Anime and Manga [Hidekane/Only slightly implied others]


**and the rain broke apart the clear blue sky**

It was a regular day. Haise was walking down the street, humming softly to himself with a soft smile painted on his lips. There were clouds over the distance, gray, but too far away for Haise to really care. The sun was warm, welcoming, shining over him as he made his way down the street.

There was nothing to bother him, and he felt light for the first time in a while. His nightmares had disappeared again for a few brief days, something he was incredibly grateful for. Although they weren't gory or plain horrifying, they still scared Haise. Because sometimes he saw people he'd never met before, sometimes he saw people that he could tell that he knew, but couldn't remember.

Haise was scared of remembering. Haise did not want to remember.

Remembering meant having to go through everything that had happened in his old life, but right now he was living a new life, a better life. From what everyone was telling him, Haise did not need to remember.

It could be worse. Sometimes, he would see a flash of purple. Red eyes and painted pink lips, flitting across his vision, blocking out the current world before it passed and he could breathe again. In worst case scenarios, his vision would blur and his head would start to spin. Other times he would fall to the ground because he couldn't stabilize himself.

But he had gotten over the memories. He had done his part of reminiscing and now it was time to get over it. He was over pain. He was going to live a happy life.

But was he _really_ happy?

There were days where he woke up feeling so hopelessly desolate and hollow on the inside that he couldn't bring himself to get out of bed. There were days where he knew he was missing something important, something that had made him endlessly happy before. There were days when he could almost taste the name on his lips, but then it would disappear just as suddenly as it came.

Haise jolted back to the present, a sour taste in the back of his palette. He scowled at the window next to him, giving off his reflection. His white hair blending with the gray-blue background. He looked up to find that the storm clouds had started to mix with the clear blue sky. He rubbed his temple and shuffled his phone out, preparing to call for someone to pick him up. He scanned the crowd while the ringtone dialed, a ring breaking the consistent hum of the crowd.

Then he saw _him_.

Haise didn't even realize that he was on his knees before he could stop it, clutching his sides, vision dotted with black spots as his head throbbed and his chest ached. Desperately trying to get the image of that golden glinted hair out of his head.

The phone clattered to the ground, blood roaring in his ears.

That hair, that color, he _knew_ that color.

He _knew_ that shade of orange, he _knew_ those headphones. His mouth formed on its own, coming out bitter, desperately, heart wrenching.

 _Hide._

The noise grew louder, blocking out all the sound, blocking out everything except for that hair, that face, that _voice._

 _Kaneki!_

No, not Kaneki, he was Haise. He was _Haise_.

 _Kaneki. Are you okay?_

No, he was not okay.

 _Haise, answer me._

Then everything cleared, his vision focused, and he realized the voice had been the phone. A crowd of people were staring at him, murmuring about the white-haired boy who had just collapsed for no reason in the middle of the street. He frantically looked around, but the mop of hair was gone. The familiar name already fading from his memory.

What was it? It started with a H, but the only name that came to his head was his own. Haise shuddered, the hollow feeling returning to his stomach.

A loud thunder clap resonated overhead, then a droplet of rain fell on his trembling form. Then another as the sky broke apart and heavens rained down. Then another, and another, and another as if even the sky pitied his current state of forgetting. Haise's gaze flitted upwards before he regained his composure and made his way to shaky feet.

With shaking fingers, Haise picked up the phone.

"Hello? …Yeah, could you pick me up please? ..."

 **Fin.**

 **Goddamit someone help me get out of this ship** ** _please_** **.**


End file.
